Centre for Vital Elders

An old Cherokee Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice, “Let me tell you a story.

I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do.

But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times.” He continued, “It is as if there are two wolves inside me. One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him, and does not take offence when no offence was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.

But the other wolf, ah! He is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.

Sometimes, it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”

The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, “The one I feed.”

When I read this old story I wondered what stories I would tell my new granddaughter as she gets older. Will I be able to tell her ‘life stories’ like this one as well as my reminiscences?

While this story comes from a Native American source, its wisdom transcends all culture. It could be told by any grandparent in any part of the world. I would guess though, that this grandparent first heard the story from one of his grandparents, and so on back through the generations.

Some cultures still value this wisdom, and respect the old people who carry it and pass it on. In our culture, however, it seems that people get less respect as they get older rather than more respect.

I can see how our emphasis on the new and the innovative has lead to the old and sustainable being cast aside. Our focus on machines and technology has upset the balance of who we are as humans. As a result our older people see little role for themselves and withdraw further. In the end older people become seen as a burden with little to offer and are either warehoused in homes or valued only for their spending power.

I wonder how many grandparents these days have this depth of self knowledge and are able to tell teaching stories like this? And I wonder how much our young people, families and communities are losing out as a result?

The Centre for Vital Elders aims to restore this old tradition of wise elders in every family.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 9th, 2006 at 3:53 am and is filed under Elders, Wisdom Stories. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.